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April 21, 2013 at 12:39 am #14160
Bryan RaymondParticipantCFP HU Intermediate Student
Join date: 2012/05/30
pretty nice rush esp coming from 4nl!
Click here to visit my Youtube channel!April 22, 2013 at 12:44 am #14239
I was playing NL4 becuase I never ever had any experience with HU. I needed to get better at it and you can see how well it works with Gordon’s help.
I have accumulated emotions. That was only matter of time when it will shows up. I never ever had a monkey tilt. I had two options. I can pretend that nothing happen and I have great mindset or I can accept that it happen and change few things to evade this. Problem with those accumulated emotion is that I am kind of happy. I don’t feel stressed or something but I still take too much stuff personally and it has impact on my tilt. It’s hard to spot that when you are happy. To pretend hand like those:
Hero (SB): $77.63 (155.3 bb)
BB: $41.98 (84 bb)
Preflop: Hero is SB with 7 7
Hero raises to $1, BB raises to $3, Hero calls $2
Flop: ($6) T 2 T (2 players)
BB bets $6, Hero calls $6
Turn: ($18) Q (2 players)
BB bets $18, Hero calls $18
River: ($54) 8 (2 players)
BB bets $14.98, Hero calls $14.98
[spoil]Results: $83.96 pot ($1.50 rake)
Final Board: T 2 T Q 8
Hero showed 7 7 and lost (-$41.98 net)
BB showed A A and won $82.46 ($40.48 net)
Hero (BB): $35.65 (71.3 bb)
SB: $82.46 (164.9 bb)
Preflop: Hero is BB with 9 9
SB raises to $1, Hero calls $0.50
Flop: ($2) Q A Q (2 players)
Hero checks, SB bets $1.50, Hero calls $1.50
Turn: ($5) J (2 players)
Hero checks, SB checks
River: ($5) 8 (2 players)
Hero checks, SB bets $79.96 and is all-in, Hero calls $33.15 and is all-in
[spoil]Results: $71.30 pot ($1.50 rake)
Final Board: Q A Q J 8
Hero showed 9 9 and lost (-$35.65 net)
SB showed T 9 and won $69.80 ($34.15 net)
I’ll work out four times a week. Good thing is that in our Mindset group we start working on our body as well so we’ll probably have some competition with it. It won’t be so easy to get rid of them but now I am aware of them and I prepared myself for them.April 22, 2013 at 11:39 pm #14240
I am doing back ups and do format. I need 64bit Windows to use fully potential from my PC. Today I should done everything.April 23, 2013 at 11:49 pm #14241
I did format and now my laptop has 64 bit OS. It works well. It’s weird for me that everything work so well and fast I must get to used to it. I am improving fighting with accumulated emotions that’s why today after work out I did warm and cold shower three times. It was very painfull (I think it will be painfull for first month or two) but it should help calm down my body and mind. It supposed to relax whole body and improve regeneration.
I am so happy that I work out at the gym otheriwse I would be very very fat. Today after hard core work out I ate whole bread, two cottage chesse and almost whole jar of nutella like chocolate that my father gave me yesterday. It was huge meal and to be honest I would eat even more if I would have something else to eat…. 😀
Last two days I was playing bad. Not spazzy or something it was just bad. I am reawatching HU mastermind becuase this is what will help me most to play solid poker. I do hero calls sometimes. I leveling, do fancy play and do other BS what is wrong. I need again learn how to do it in Gordon way.April 24, 2013 at 11:20 pm #14242
April 26, 2013 at 12:17 am #14243
It’s funny how our mindset group works. We use Gordon idea with paying cash for not doing something. I love money and I don’t like to lose money, that’s why it works twice as good for me. Yesterday after session I was mega tierd and last thing I wanted to do was those stupid mindset exercise but still losing cash was to painfull for me. It was funny becuase I was swearing for ten minutes how dumb I was to do those commitments but still I did those exercise and went sleep.
I know I should inspire myself and do everything with huge smile. Realitty is that I swear out loud for ten minutes and then do those things. For me it really doesn’t matter how I do those things the most important thing is that I do them. I know it’s kind of funny that we use something that primitive to force ourselves to do more but it works, pain is our greates motivator.
Almost last thing what Franek want to do when he wake up is going for a 5km walk. I said almost because last thing he want to do is paying me 100$ for not doing that… 😀 He’s phone is tracked by GPS and I know exaclty where he had this walk and how long it took. I had the same comitment with gym. I must go 4 times a week. I like gym but it was always hard for me to go 4 times a week. Nothing change except that if I don’t do that I’ll pay him 100$. I am also tracked and he can check how much time I spent at the gym and where I was.April 27, 2013 at 12:25 am #14244
Definetely two worst days in my whole life when it comes to running bad. I want to crush something. Good thing is that those mental exercsie teach me how to deal with it. I was mega angry but still playing my game. Maybe in next few months I’ll learn how to no get pissed about those things.April 27, 2013 at 12:50 am #14161
Bryan RaymondParticipantCFP HU Intermediate Student
Join date: 2012/05/30
I went through the same thing this month but things change quickly keep the confidence
Click here to visit my Youtube channel!April 27, 2013 at 8:23 am #14245
Yeah fror sure. Yesterday I did yummy chuck steak (maybe I’ll add some cranberries) and I was more hungry than pissed. Now I want to play even more becuase I want to achieve long time faster 🙂April 28, 2013 at 12:15 am #14246
Next losing day. I am not even angry or something. I’ll have my free day tomorrow and we’ll see does it change on monday. It stops impact me I am kind of emotionless. It usually works that way when I have too much emotions in a short peroid of time I stop feeling anything nor anger nor happines nothing. I think my brain just did a break. I had many times like that and I kind of like that state. I am very calm.April 28, 2013 at 11:27 pm #14247
Sunday was my free day. I was thinking about my game and I think I spotted few things I can improve. I couldn’t check it because today I can’t play poker nor use HM. I waste most of my day playing on Warcraft. I think I wanted to feel that I am crushing everyone after those loses at poker. I haven’t play in Warcraft for a looooong time but I am still much better than average person. I find out that poker changed the way I think in my whole life. I don’t improve only my poker thinking process, I improve the way I think in real life as well. Even in computer game I think in different way, I was adapting all the time. Opponent was changing his strategy so do I. I lost skill because I didn’t practice it for so long but I think I am better than I used to be because I just adapt better. I try to adapt all the time, like in Heads up. I am very glad that I changed Short Handed to Heads up. It put more pressure on me, it’s much harder to me it’s harder to don’t do spazzes to stay calm and to play relaxed but it’s definitely worth it. Even if it’s hard now I think it will get harder but if it’s the price I need to pay, that’s fine, I am ready for it. I’ll learn how to deal with more and more shit.
Today I am thinking too much about everything and that’s why I decided to write something. It should help clear my mind. Those free days are good because I can think about poker in different way than usual. I find more problems that I wasn’t aware of. I think I rest while I work because after this free day I am more tiered than usual. I want to go to sleep because I know tomorrow I’ll wake up and do my job then it’ll be easier to rest. I am so fucking tiered doing nothing it is only one day but I am exhausted.
I have great gym. Most of members are huge. One third of them have tattoo and / or scars. I was thinking why I don’t see too many small / fat guys there but now I think I know now. It’s simple. When skinny guy join a gym when almost everyone lift 3-4x time as much as him, nearly everyone have more than 10cm in biceps than he is, he’ll feel mega bad with himself and he’ll quit easier. It’s funny that after two years at gym I feel mega small and weak, still I love it. At old gym big guys were lifting 150-180 and average was 90-100 kg on deadlift I was lifting 120kg and it was great for me, I was above average and I felt great. Now average guy here lift 120-150kg and those big lift 200kg+.
Nobody hides than he’s on steroids. They are making fun about themselves about steroids in front of everyone. I’ve heard that one guy was stupid because he should use metanabol and not winstrol. I’ve heard about steroid on my old gym (coaches thought I was taking them and I don’t want to tell them) but never in front of everyone. I am glad they take them, I am glad most of guys have 40cm+ in biceps there. Because even if I don’t want to take steroids I’ll work my ass of there. I prefer to be worst from best than best from the worst. Anyway when I am worst at something my ego hurt and I work harder. I know that I won’t be as huge as them without steroids but I don’t care I can use my ego to gain some nice muscle and improve my appearance.April 29, 2013 at 10:22 pm #14248
4rd lossing day in a row. Today I handled it great. Said twice or three times “fuck” and this is all. I felt frustrate a bit when I had two guys who was raising every flop and 3beting a lot, they were playing with me at the same time. Today I handled everything great. I finded out that most of my job on my mindset I did outside of poker table. That’s why I decided that I’ll rewatch every table where I lost cash. I’ll watch every hand on those tables. I spoted some mistakes I made. Usually it’s not a big problem when you’re running good or normal but when you running bad you need to focus on every mistake you made. I have two choice I can bitching that I am running bad or I can use those bad run to work more on my game away from the table. Of course I’ll chose second option becasue first doesn’t change anything. I am watching again Gordon’s course I’ll make some new notes and I’ll find out what I am doing wrong.
PS. I got email from mail list with title: “It will pass”. It seems promisingly 🙂April 30, 2013 at 11:04 pm #14249
Yupi! Winning session!
Those guys today was fucking insane. They didn’t let me go. I had a plan to play 3h session and make a break, long story short I’ve been playing for ~420 min… I had run for life to fridge to grab chuck steak and some rice to eat. I didn’t prepare anything to eat because I didn’t want to play for soooo long….
Sometimes I wonder how the fuck I can eat sooooo much 😀 I came back from gym and ate 300-400 gram of chuck steak with 3 bags of rice. After that I fall down at bed and fall asleep for nearly an hour. Waked up and went to grind. I think I need to work out a bit softer… 😀
I’ll definitely give up on those shit from market. I don’t eat junky food buy when I moved out I used to buy prepare meat. It’s less tasty, less healthy and more expensive. This is second time when I bought raw meat and did something on my own. It’s much more tasty, it’s healthier and I feel much better after it. It takes some time but for fuck’s sake it’s even enjoyable. I like doing it and I’ll definitely do it more often. It will help me gain some weight. Soon I’ll try doing something fancy 🙂May 1, 2013 at 10:41 pm #14251
I am very happy today because I went back after tilt, play solid and won some more money. I wanted to do a break but then I saw Gordon movie from his tilt free course and go back to playing, here’s the outcome:
One of exercise was to write down 10 things that you complain about. I wrote down 3 things and have problems to write something more. I was searching something on my blog, I spotted two more things and gave up with searching something new. Anyway I am going to do exercise he gave in his course. Since today I am making a “Stop Whining Bitch challenge” I won’t complain or write complains in next 10 days. I am not allowed to complain out loud or write bad beat stories for ten days. If I fail I’ll start this exercise again. I am not count a trash talk or swearing as a complains, it’s a hobby of mine and somehow I like it 🙂May 1, 2013 at 10:57 pm #14252
btw made my day:
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