Online Poker: The conspiracy theory

Last week I came across a blog post and it made me laugh, so I have to share this one with you. It’s really brilliant and sad at the same time. I’ve read numerous theories about online poker being rigged, but this reason to quit tops it all. I quote:

 

“World economy collapse:

The USA is bankrupt. US dollar is just printed paper with illusion value in trust of people. EUR value is covered by USD. USD value becomes zero from day to day and EUR will follow immediately. Already one year Russia makes (MAKES, not print) new currency based on the gold standard. Russia is going to take payments for gas in gold, not in dollars. China, Brasilia, India South Africa stands behind Russia and will no longer use the dollar as well. This will bury USD much faster.

World war 3:

The only one way for the USA to get out of that shit is a war. USA and NATO are going to attack Russia and since Eastern Europe will be battlefield I´ll truly have things to deal with other than poker. Don´t be blind, there is absolutely no way to avoid a war! 

If you’re not blind or careless, immediately forgot what you have seen on TV and what other normal people say and then start to look for correct information on the internet independent coverage. Look for more than 3 sources of information to be sure where the true is (I´ve gone through over 6 sources from 3 countries and everything agreed). But first, you need to forget that true reality from TV news that every man base opinions on because 100 times repeated lie becomes true.”

Hmm… the guy has a point! This blog post made me think and I did a small research about online poker and ‘the conspiracy theory’. A few examples:

 

Fuckpokerstars.com – A website that warns you about online poker… “Pokerstars and other online poker games are cheating everybody by preloaded hands!” Some serious allegations here…

“Bad beat theory” – Variance is a bitch, every poker player knows. But some players’ perception of the number of bad beats they get as opposed to the ones they deal out is way off! It’s a theory we hear a lot in forums, but there was never any evidence of poker rooms actually rigging the game against certain players.

Great Poker Conspiracy song:

 

“Cash out theory” – A recreational player has an upswing, withdraws a big portion of his winnings and after that, he started losing. Conclusion: poker rooms do not want players to cash out.

If you don’t understand bankroll management and variance this could be your theory! Heaters don’t tend to last very long, so it usually also doesn’t take long before a downswing occurs. Nothing rigged about that in my opinion.

“God mode ON” – since the Ultimate Bet’s super-user cheating scandal, players have been concerned about super users. In this case, some people actually have a point. I advise you to play on poker rooms with a solid reputation, as they won’t allow certain things to happen.

Online poker killed Osama Bin Laden – another “what the f*” moment for me. According to the theory that the CIA discovered Bin Laden’s most trusted aide was also an online poker player and this way they found out where Osama Bin Laden was hiding. Read for yourself.

Conclusion

It’s clear, we should all stop dealing with online poker right away, disconnect from the internet and start hiding in a cave… World War 3 and poker don’t go hand in hand…

Or, of course, we could stop blaming the world for our own incompetence and start crushing the game today!

What is your opinion on this subject and what is your favorite conspiracy theory?

 

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3 replies
  1. @vars
    @vars says:

    Coming from the eastern part of Europe myself, I do like to keep an eye out for the political situation and I also am somewhat concerned about what may or may not happen in the near future. I’d say that there’s little wrong with being precautious and prepared for whatever realistic scenario that may happen. I would be skeptical though about quitting poker being the no-brainer solution to this kind of a problem. While I think everyone of us should have a plan B if for whatever reason poker no longer is an option, the WW3 predictions presented by the guy quoted at the beginning of this article do look like they’re based on non-confirmable information and sources that are likely highly unreliable. The concerns themselves I find somewhat justified, but even then – it’s not like there’s much to be done about it anyway. Not continuing with crushing fish and weaker regs because of that would be somewhat stupid. I say – we play till they nuke us. And then we play some more. At least until we die from a pretty painful and slow radiation death. Gotta prepare your A-game for that!

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